I write this blog in a very cheerful state of mind. I thought I’d be inside a bunker waiting for some army guy to give me five minutes of his spare time with the laptop to write it. But thankfully we did not go to war and we did not bomb New York, Washington or the White House. The collective anger that our Sonia-led government felt after our dear Shahrukh was detained at a US airport surely had me putting my last penny on Indian jets making mincemeat of the Americans. Sonia’s best friend – of course she will be a minister in that case- Ambika Soni even said we must have a ‘tit-for-tat’ policy. But the Americans chickened out, and left Shahrukh after he managed to convince the whites in the Homeland Sdecurity at the Port of Entry that he is a good actor and that films like DDLJ, KANK are masterpieces of Indian cinema and that India was one massive land mass of mustard fields and all of us usually travelled abroad to Switzerland’s Yash Chopra lake to cavort with our girlfriends, lip-synch with them along with synchronized dance steps. So there was no war because the Americans didn’t show their tits, so we spared them the tats.Come to think of it. Poor little APJ Kalam, a nice bloke if there are any left in India, might be feeling a bit left out. The Americans made him do far worse things, in India beat that, and still not a word from the government. But that is understandable because Kalam has been wasting a lot of time with the saffronwalas of late and touching the feet of sundry babas so the Congress really cannot stand up for someone with such bad taste.Now coming back to SRK. I think he is just pissed off because we in India tend to give our lads enough leeway and space to think they own the frigging establishment.So SRK might be the centre of all attention when he alights at any Indian airport, but sadly this time he just got the rough end of the stick. Now Mid-day says he told the US chaps that he is a friend of Hillary Clinton. That is so typical Dilliwala of SRK. The moment a traffic cop catches you, tell him that Shiela Dikshit is my mummy’s elder sister or Arun Jaitley and you went to law school together.A recent research shows that if all the people in Delhi who say they are related to X or Y politicians are taken at face value, then every MP will need to have at least 783 brothers, 519 sisters, 14679 nephews, 1234 nieces- women tend to pull this stunt less- and 350 wives for it all be true. We are a nation just like that. We treat our heroes better and it is time someone told Uncle Sam that. Look at Sanjay Dutt. The chap is a legally a jailbird as someone convicted under the stringent (only for common Indians though) Arms Act. But our man is off shooting to Bahamas, partying in South Africa and then giving sundry interviews to film glossies on how he longs for the freedom he deserves. Right.To top it all and rub it in, the man appears on Sony’ Dus ka Dum- with ‘booze’um pal Salman- and asks the audience in mock Khalnayak style- bolo main gunehgaar hu kya? And the crowd- of course fed on the channels rent-a-crowd policy with Bisleri, snacks and Rs 500 per day- shout in unison ‘NNNOOOO’. I’m tempted to ask whether that is contempt of court or not. What Mr Dutt pulled off was nothing but a loud shout that the law is an ass and the judge who convicted him a bit off the rockers.Look at Harbhajan Singh. When Usain Bolt, Roger Federer and several other sporting legends have no problem with the anti-doping regulations of the WADA, our man will have none of it. What if the chaps come to check his urine when he is out to shoot a commercial of Royal Stag which he has managed after telling the coach that his spinning finger got stuck in the door so he can’t bowl? Very unfair. So Harbhajan has made it clear he will not bow down to these rules. As for the BCCI, the support is whole-hearted because the Ms Pawar and Modi never wanted cricket to come up within the ambit of any world-recognised sports body anyway. They would continue to let cricket remain a kangaroo sport governed by kangaroo courts as long as the moolah flows in. So if someone takes drugs- like stay Steyn- then we will just announce it six months after the tournament and smugly tell the world you can crucify someone with retrospective effect, can you?Salman Khan might not be the ideal Indian hero when it comes to morals. But he had one sane word to say. Speaking to Asian Age, he said the SRK issue was ‘no big deal’. And then he hit the nail on the head. ‘They are particular about their security and that could be the reason why they have not had anything after 9/11’ Salman said.Now we are at the end of it all a nation that allows 7/11, 26/11 and god knows how many more elevens in store that will leave the psyche of our nation in sixes and sevens. So let it all go.I just wonder how did SRK manage to convince the Americans he is a good actor? That must have been tough after playing Raj Malhotra from age 25 to 45 film after film, interview after interview.